This is our “Excerpts from a Dairy” series. We publish excerpts of thoughts and reflections from emails, dairies and journals of people from the queer community. These excerpts could be complete entries or uncompleted and unstructured excerpts that show our personal thoughts and reflections about our lived experience.
We welcome submissions and they can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
The below excerpt, extracted from a longer email, is an answer to someone being asked “when did you make the decision to turn gay”?
“Let me start by answering your questions: … I did not make a “decision to turn gay”. At the age that my peers started getting interested in people of the “opposite” sex, my attractions were to someone of the same sex. It was not a decision that I made. I simply accepted my attractions. I did not need to “turn” gay – I just had to name my attractions and act in ways that made sense to me in terms of developing intimacy. Not to say that some people don’t figure it out after having been with someone of the “opposite” sex, or figure out that they are attracted to both sexes, or to people on the wide spectrum of male or female. I don’t think there is a “right” way to become gay or straight or bi – we are attracted to different people and thus do what feels right/true/authentic to each of us”.