A holiday is a special day for everyone, but it is a much bigger deal for Habeshas. It is a time spent with the ones we love but for me, what comes to mind during holidays is the amount of work that needs to be done. Everything should look perfect. For us girls and women, it is especially the time we are supposed to prove that we are worthy of getting a husband. My mother used to tell me that I would not find a husband if I don’t work hard enough. Of course, the irony is that this was my plan all along. I think that’s why I still don’t know how to cook “Doro wot”. I know that not being able to do something is not something to be proud of, but I guess I just needed to prove to my mom that my worth was not dependent on my being able to do housework. I think this is the case for most of my fellow Habesha girls. For some girls, as my friend also told me, it is the day they spend sleeping and feel that there is nothing special about the day.
What made this year unique though was the fact that I got to welcome the new year with my special family – my queer family; specifically, my fellow queer women. It was unique because not only did I get to spend it with other queer women, but we had so much fun, and it felt so different. It is not every day that you see people like you who feel the way you feel sharing their special day with you.
I can’t say enough about how great I felt spending that moment with queer women. It was great looking at everyone having fun, some of whom were with the love of their lives while others were with their friends. For me, it felt like home although I had never even experienced anything like this before. I saw that everyone else was also having fun and they were sharing my satisfaction.
For someone like me who had to work every holiday eve, it was great that drinks and food were provided. I didn’t need to be cooking and doing loads of work at home for the holiday to be perfect. I was just enjoying the moment with my chosen queer family. Having a comfortable place to be, was also great for people like my friend who used to sleep and feel indifferent about holidays. It was an incredible moment for us. Seeing my queer family having fun and freely dancing with whom they chose was wonderful. I was more than enjoying the sight and I felt it was a special day.
I had only one unfulfilled wish though. There is this ritual that there should be a kiss at midnight just for the fun of it. But we didn’t do that, and my queer ass was complaining about it. Maybe next time I will kiss someone. I guess, the dance and the warm hugs more than made up for it though. Other than that, it was an extraordinary moment, and I am delighted I experienced this new year with my queer family.