Life is not what you expect. I say this because unexpected things can happen without you even realizing it. Call it an accident or fate! You can’t plan for everything. You might have an idea in mind, but something completely unrelated might happen. It could be good or bad; it’s about accepting whatever comes your way. Here [in Ethiopia], we refer to this as or per “the Creator’s Will.”
One of the significant challenges of being a queer Ethiopian is the uncertainty of what might happen at any moment, like even in two seconds. A single individual, campaigning with a message like “I am against homosexuality,” can profoundly impact your life and the queer community around you; it can shake everything to its core. This uncertainty is what makes it difficult to navigate life. You never know when someone might discover your true self—whether at work, during sports training, or even among friends and family. When that happens, it’s an additional struggle to fit into their world, often feeling like a black sheep. Yet, you must be resilient and push forward. I don’t want to rely on anyone; regardless of what life throws at me, I want to create my own path.
Just when you think things are going well, you lose the person you love—yet another unexpected twist in life. Life is like a wildfire in Los Angeles; it’s unpredictable. Maybe some had a hint, like The Simpsons. 😅 But that’s just how life unfolds.
The most important thing is to live a balanced life. At the risk of sounding a bit pretentious, I’m working on achieving that balance. I often struggle with planning. I tell myself, “Okay, I’ll budget this much for entertainment this month,” but then the fun takes over, and I end up spending more than I intended and I am broke. It is when my stomach starts singing the blues, that I realize I need to get back on track.
By regularly checking in with myself and asking, “What are you doing?” when I’m having too much fun, I can reflect and realign with myself. This sometimes means letting go of some friendships, if our perspectives differ. Conversely, when I feel overextended at work, I remind myself to “let go.” Enjoying time with my queer friends is also a vital source of strength, filled with play, love, and laughter—almost like a good counseling service.
Even when life is confusing and the future is uncertain, I learn from my mistakes, plan anew, work hard, and enjoy myself wisely, all of which helps me maintain my mental health.